Why the wife does not want intimacy with her husband: reasons, solving the problem, who is to blame, the advice of a psychologist

Why the wife does not want intimacy with her husband: reasons, solving the problem, who is to blame, the advice of a psychologist.

If you read this article, it means that this problem also touched your family or an icy block has already hung over your family boat, about to smash it on small chips. Sad, but the fact – almost every man asks this question. Why does the wife do not want intimacy, what is the reason, who is to blame? Agree, this is a serious splinter in one place. Children, life, apartments and all the blessings of the world will not be bored with a couple as it does high -quality sex! We got married and got married not to drink tea and play cards in the evenings, though? We were drawn to each other, we kissed, caressed the bodies and had sex. The hormones went through the world at our feet. And I want it all my life …

Dear men, be sure to read to the end, because women are not as simple as with you! And before you get to the bottom of the truth, you will have to sweat a little. This is not a new bumper for a car on the Internet to look))) This is a woman ..

Reason the first: weak sexual constitution or frigidity

Of course, there is a difference between low sexual temperament and frigidity, but for a man thirsty, it is almost gone. The result is one – the husband grinds the wall from night and morning, sorry, erections, ladies’ legs and assholes, snooping everywhere, and at least she would have something. She doesn’t understand this! Over time, such a wife always climbs between her legs begins to irritate.

Alas, guys, this is nature. Her physiology and psychology. Such a woman will be happy only with such a man with whom they will arrange other priorities together (apartment, car, cottage, cats – emphasize the right one). If you are a temperamental person, I want sex every day, nothing will come of this lady. Why was it wrong at the beginning of the relationship? Everything is simple: the first year or two even the “slightly warm” endorphins jump. Then it leaves, especially in everyday life and after childbirth.

Solution

In principle, there are options. The question is whether you need it, and whether your wife will go to some conditions.

• We are looking for a compromise. In fact, a condition is simply set that will indicate the middle ground for you two. For example, she is enough once every two weeks, and you – every day. Compromise: three times a week on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays (joke). Just three times. Blood from the nose, but should. In principle, the middle ground was found. The catch is that she will be reluctant to do this, you will still be not enough, and few people excite a log in bed.
• Mistress. Also a compromise option. If you have repeatedly discussed the lack of sex, gave her reasonable arguments about your needs, but she “I don’t want and that’s it”, try to warn about treason. Either this will enlighten her and gives the light (jealousy is able to heat the Wishlist below the belt up to 100 Celsius), or she will generally agree to the presence of the second woman. This happens and often! A frigid woman really wants a family, but does not want a constant stupid (in her understanding) fuss in bed, loves, appreciates, does not want to lose? In this case, she will fully accept her mistress as a kind of “rubber zina”. The main thing is to her only physiology, and his wife is love and all the benefits.
• Divorce. Do not want such a head? There are no children, apartments yet? There are, but grew up, and the apartments are already across the throat? And in general, the head is no longer able to think and solve the issue, Why the wife doesn’t want me? I want my wife, but she is not me. She didn’t want to at 20, she didn’t want to, at 40, she will forget what sex is and why he needs it. Run! Save yourself! There is only one life. You can’t live again.

Reason the second: the effect of novelty or “Genesis Zamed” disappeared

And here most of the married couples stumble! This The most common reason why there is no sex in the family! Everything is taken along and across, all poses are tested, each gesture can be guessed a hundred days ahead. Predictability. That’s all. And also work, cleaning, cooking, children, their studies, snot, whims and further on the list. Bytovuha. In such conditions The wife does not even want to just kiss, Because by evening, just to the pillow ..

And husbands do not differ with special fervor. I came home from work, ate, a telephone telephone, a couple of subtitlers (and the wife is waiting for help), wife a couple of slaps in the pope (such as attention) and in bed. Even if there was sex, then the question is how? I touched here, I crumpled, talked, two minutes and … finish, dear. Further female hearing pleases snoring. But more often in such realities the wife does not give.

Solution

I think the good half of the men recognized themselves in this description) Guys, this is not in reproach. Just need to change this way. Answer the following questions honestly. In them you will find many solutions to the problem when your wife does not want to have sex with you.

• The last time you gave your wife flowers? Just like that, not for the holiday.
• When you looked at her in love with a lover, for example, at a joint dinner?
• On a common weekend, you prepared her breakfast at least once?
• You will wake her kisses and affectionate words? She falls asleep under your delicate kisses or affection (not sexy)?
• The last time you talked with her about how her day goes? When interested in her experiences? You are generally interested in her mental state?
• You compliment her? Celebrate new outfits, hairstyles, makeup?
• You help her around the house and with the children at least a little?
• You ask her at least a couple of times a week the question: “Farm, how to help you?”
• You are interested in her health, the successes of children in the garden or school?
• You let her go with friends or a little a little to ventilate?
• When you rested last time together?
• ? When you whispered to her in the ear, how much you want her, gently stroking at the same time?
• You give her linen, jewelry, cosmetics?
• She has a hobby for which there is enough time after all the worries about the family and the house? Is there a joint hobby?
• You have evenings when you just talk? As friends! Do not stupid on the phone, but speak, looking into each other’s eyes!
• You recall the beginning of your relationship, the first sex, some events?
• You have “places of military glory”, where something memorable (bright sex, first kiss, something else that unites you)? You visit them?

Just a few questions. Answer them, analyze your relationship, and you will find a solution. This is practically a guide to action! If The reason for the wife’s refusal of sex The fact that all the good has disappeared in everyday life, fatigue ate all her strength, and in your male indifference, then this. After answering questions, read an article about the best poses in sex for girls and women and delight your beauty at leisure.

By the way, diversify intimate, revealing new faces of each other’s sensuality will help sex toys. Many of this are embarrassed and afraid to ask the seller, and even more so buy a vibrator or something else terribly vulgar … In this case, go to the largest sex shop Eroshop and choose in your interests! The goods come in opaque packaging, delivery is fast, everything is anonymous. Why not start to establish sexual contacts from such a gift to your beloved wife?

Reason the third: Health

When we want sex? When we feel good! If something hurts you, the desire leaves. This is nature. Even cats with hamsters propagate only under good living conditions, nutrition and well -being. The function of continuing the genus disappears first if the listed conditions are absent. People too. Women first of all.

What could be wrong with the health of a woman? There are many reasons!

• Hormonal disorders, caused by natural processes (pregnancy, illness) or the adoption of contraceptives, which all completely extinguished libido. Klimax, after all. Natural extinction, alas. In this case, only the doctor will help to correct the situation. Today you can extend the reproductive function at least up to 70!
• Gynecological or urological problems. All kinds of thrush, cystitis, urethritis, salpingites, etc.D. If the wife has problems in the female part, the desire for sex is reset. Do not be offended – this is health. Anyone can get sick, and you are no exception.
• Any serious ailments, having constant in nature. Migraines, back pain, nausea, weakness due to the same fallen hemoglobin and t.D. If some painful process in the body regularly finishes it, bed entertainment will fade into the background.

What will help? Not what, and who. His name is the doctor. To him and quickly.

C reason fourth: the husband does not attract or satisfies poorly

In principle, these two positions are closely connected. If you do not attract it outwardly, then sex will be through a stump-column, and, conversely, if in sex you prefer to “shoot” and on the side, and let your wife take care of your orgasm yourself, then over time and externally you stop working for herattracting attention with “beacon”.

Solution

In marriage, not only women cease to monitor their appearance. Men do it more often! The girl married a slender guy who gave her flowers, and after 5 years a creature of 130 kg sits nearby, emitting gases in the sofa, crisp with beer chips and forgetting to wash before bedtime. This is asexual! Dear men, Follow your weight, purity of linen and clothes, body condition, smells, habits!

The same applies to sexual behavior issues. Do not treat family sex as obligations. Yes, sometimes fast sex for draining tension is needed, and women, too, but in bed you still need to work and take care of the pleasure of a partner. Do not forget about her erogenous zones, look for new ones, talk to her about what you like and attracts. Look at erotica, mark what it reacts and excited. Why erotica? Because not all women are on the moves are imbued with special feelings for porn. If your wife is one of those who with a subtle mental device and requires half an hour before sexual intercourse to whisper her tenderness in her ear or stroke the neck, then only erotica, beautiful, passionate and, by the way, no less exciting.

Try to frankly talk to your wife, maybe she has secret fantasies, some fetish that she is shy about saying aloud. Look at the Fetish and BDSM section, show her this page. Suddenly she will like something) your sweet and affectionate girl can experience such desires that you would never have guessed! Maybe she wants to dominate and beg you handcuffs? Or wants to see a rapist-racer in you, which will punish her for resistance with a whip? Female fantasies are very diverse …

AND Do not forget about romance! This is the basis of all the foundations! Do not turn your intimate life into a monotonous routine. Remember how you looked after your beloved when she was inaccessible and could slip away from you. Many husbands believe that the wife will not go anywhere – she has already been won. No and no again! You can’t think so. There will always be the one who gives her romance, the sky in the stars and passionate kisses under him. Do not bring to that.

If you spend a lot of time at work, you have no time to pay attention to your wife, try to have virtual sex with her in correspondence. How to do this correctly, read in our article how to have virtual sex in correspondence. It may not be sex, but just flirting, seduction of each other, when in every word there is a hint of something more, when in the sent photo there is not a naked body, but naked shoulders and a seductive hollow between your beloved breast … fantasize, play, seduce it withmorning, in the evening she burned with desire.

Reason fifth: psychological troubles and resentment

Each offensive word in disputes and quarrels painfully wounds a woman and leaves a mark on a loving heart. Your inattention and coldness in everyday life settled in her soul like ash after the eruption of the volcano, covering with a thick nast everything is bright and beautiful. Insincerity, frank lies, scandals, reproaches, attempts to blame each other – enemies of good sex.

Solution

Know how to notice your mistakes, analyze your behavior. Do not look for guilty in another person. If you feel that there is cooling, just talk to her, find out the reason, Why doesn’t she want sex, After all, she can be offended by what you are not guessing or already forgotten. Perhaps she does not like that after work you watch TV instead of talking to her or help with a child. Most likely, she talked about it, but she did not achieve the result. Household resentment originated, which grows like a snowball every day. In this case, sex will be less and less.

The reason is the sixth: your betrayal or her lover

The husband changed

If a wife became aware of your betrayal, she can pretend that she forgave, at first even sex against a background of jealousy becomes brighter, and then rolling backwards! And with such force, as if tsunami everything was demolished in its path. Having sex with her husband after his betrayal, the wife constantly imagines how it was with the other, how he caressed her, how he finished, which he thought at that moment. She begins to compare herself with her mistress, look for flaws in herself. In a word, these are unbearable torment that corrode a woman from the inside, like acetic acid. Her psyche at some point includes a protective mechanism: do not have sex with this man, so as not to plunge into the abyss of all experiences. This is a normal reaction. You were cut off to survive.

Solution

What do you do? If you really repent in your act, love your wife, want to be with her, want to have sex with her, then tolerate. Give her time to recover, survive this pain. As much caress and care as possible, do not be angry with her refusals. Just be near. Just love her and live with her these emotions. Never talk about the details of sex on the other. To all one answer: the demon was bewildered. No comparisons! Wife is the most beautiful and sexy, most desirable, you just stumbled … Gifts, trips, sincere conversations, attention, help with children – further as you yourself come up with your situation. There is a chance that everything will work out.

The wife has a lover

We will not figure out why he appeared in her. This is the topic of another article. And in fact, everything is clear. Why does a wife don’t want sex with her husband? Because she has a lover, and she cheats on her husband! There are new emotions, new sensations, butterflies in the stomach, plans, romance – blows the roof, not otherwise. And with my husband everything is predictable and one -sided. Although a woman more often changes not at the call of physiology. Rather, these are feelings and emotions ..

Solution

If you do not consider a divorce option, your wife is dear to you, you want to save your family, intimate and everything that once connected you, talk to her. Look for the reason why it turned towards treason. What does that man give her?

• Perhaps her life was overwhelmed, and you always somewhere to the side and took all the responsibilities to her, which is why she ceased to feel like a woman-so, a screw in a mechanism called “Family”.
• Or you live in eternal need, wandering around rented apartments, save on everything, and there is a sip of fresh air, restaurants, gifts and light at the end of the tunnel.
• It is possible that you just do not arouse it anymore or do not satisfy it. As a husband arrange, but as a lover – not very.
• A lover can be a punishment for your past treason, which she does not talk about, but she knows everything.

If you had experience in solving such a problem, you clarified why your wife does not want sex with my husband, share with us and other readers in the comments with your knowledge) let’s help each other in such difficult life situations!